And so it begins

Day 1 in Korea

“I don’t know when I count” I say to my husband. In this particular instance, we were aboard a bus taking us from the in-processing building on post to the DFAC (dining facility) for breakfast. The guy wrangling us on to the bus had called for a count off, and luckily in this case I was able to quickly enough discern they just wanted people on the bus and not specifically soldiers and blurted out “Three!” without too much confusion.

But this has been a theme of the past 24 hours or so and will likely continue to be at least during the in-processing ahead. Of the two dozen or so new soldiers who arrived yesterday and are doing “Day Zero” training all day today, not one seems to have a spouse along, though several have families as they've asked questions about how to address various issues when their families arrive. Overall, I’ve been either completely ignored or politely acknowledged depending on the situation, from the briefer giving me a warm “Good morning, ma’am” to the later comment I heard on the bus– “We have 25 people on the bus. But it’s not all military, there’s a wife.” (I can’t even really discern the reason for the last comment- it seemed to just be a statement of fact, but why did the commenter feel the need to differentiate?) There was even a small ruckus at said dining facility when the cashier at the front was insistent that either I couldn’t eat there or that I had to pay (the first was untrue, the second we were offering money for, to some confusion) which was only cleared up many minutes later after some tricky limited language conversation with the manager. And of course, after holding up many of the other folks behind us.

As I noticed when I stayed with Ben in the soldier’s quarters a few months ago at JAG school, none of the other spouses I’ve encountered seem particularly keen to jump into these experiences with their significant others. They seem to stay in hotels elsewhere, eat elsewhere, generally make themselves scarce unless at an official event where showing up and looking pretty is part of the package. It’s probably that they all know better than me, or have done this once and are now over dealing with the awkward looks, or perhaps feel awkward themselves walking around in soldier’s quarters and facilities like they belong (God knows I do). There's that whole "they're serving the country, it's a very special job," and technically we're not... but....

In some ways, this pisses me off that spouses who have likely given up their careers, homes, friends and familiar circumstances to move across an ocean to support their service member can’t feel comfortable in their new surroundings. But yesterday I also realized that in some ways I was the only spouse in attendance at Ben’s “bring your wife to work” day. If he were at my research office in Seattle, I wouldn’t want him interrupting my boss’s remarks or getting in my way when I’m trying to accomplish things. So should I be surprised that it makes the most sense for me to mostly be quiet and ask questions only when we’re waiting around?

The to-do list for today looks both terribly domestic and at the same time just awesome. After balancing school, work, thesis, student senate and school governance,  both past and upcoming wedding celebrations  and until fairly recently helping with a mayoral campaign, it’s strange to be by myself with no phone, no internet (yet) and a full day to deal with such a small number of things. I can understand how it would be easy in this life to focus on keeping the home in order and going to the gym, and I think I’ll enjoy it for a while and then enjoy getting back to work myself.

To do:

Call the sister

Go to mini-PX

Go swimming! A lap lane that's completely empty= heaven!

Enter ID in system so I can leave post

Explore- hotel, post, as far as I can walk?

Korean character flashcards

Buy a watch (so used to the iPhone ):

Work on rank/symbols

Vocab of the day:
Korean: 여보세요/ Annyong Haseo= hello (new goal to phonetically spell out as many Korean vocab words as possible in the future!)
Military: DFAC= dining facility

Waiting, waiting

Some time between middle and high school, I remember hearing a performance of a song which I'm pretty sure was a spiritual which went something like, "Waiting... waiting... waiting... waiting... waiting, all my life." I can't find reference to it on the wide web, but I'll continue to believe it exists.

The song seemed laborious, sad, beautiful... and I'm not shocked that it's coming to mind right now. I'm completely tuckered out, with the little frantic rabbit-patter in my chest still, and yet everything hinges on waiting for something out of my control. This coming morning, if all goes well, someone in Korea will have put their stamp of approval on one piece of paper (my command sponsorship) and sent it to an installation in Georgia, where someone will amend another piece of paper (hubs' orders), who will then have to book me on an international flight that leaves TOMORROW.

And of course if all is set in motion as hoped, tomorrow is all the time we have to drop off my car on post (an hour away) to be shipped, get me a visa from the Korean consulate, merely begin processing my government passport application and drop off some of our remaining belongings in storage. And then some other errands like doing our taxes, throwing a goodbye party and finding a temporary home for my wedding dress that don't hinge on bureaucracies across two continents behaving. Ah life.

It is fantastic to have the hubs back. It is not so fantastic to feel a bit adrift- unemployed (if temporarily) for one of few times since I was 14, graduated from school (yay! what now?) and unsure of what's next and if it will even resemble anything like former phases of life. I am thrilled to see my recently-engaged sister within the week and trek off on this adventure in earnest, but right now it's a lot of uphill boulder rolling and paper pushing before we get to even glimpse the other side. Also trying to get wedding/reception receptions mailed... um tomorrow. I'm rethinking my previous conviction that handcrafting and wax sealing each one was absolutely essential. Good night, and good luck.

Vocab of the day:
Korean: 급함 = hurry
Military: AT = awaiting transportation

Inside/Outside

Wow, today my work sent out the following email. So incredibly sweet, but also a little overwhelming with all the military-ness. I guess it's time to get used to it...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ten-Hut!

Shannon is shaving her head, donning camo, and heading to Korea!

(She's graduating early; her last day at work is 3/19.)

Let's have a little [office] gathering to give Shannon a big Hooah!*

Shannon ain't no box of rocks,** but while she's been squared away*** at [work], she's entering newbie**** land now.

Please bring some beverages and/or snacks, 4 pm, [office] barracks. Weather permitting, we'll hit the deck. Camo encouraged, but not necessary.

Questions? Just ask Sgt. Star:  http://sgtstar.goarmy.com/ActiveAgentUI/welcome.aspx

Need a little bootcamp before 3/18? Watch an episode of "Army Wives"  (starting its 4th season ... who knew?)

http://www.mylifetime.com/shows/army-wives

Or, perhaps read the moving poem below (moving... get it?) from the "Army Wives" website.

over and out (and clearly unfit for duty),

d

*Probably one of the best known Army words is "Hooah!" (pronounced who-ah, or who-uh). This word is usually shouted or grunted by motivated soldiers. It's general meaning is "Yes", "OK", "I agree with you", "Awesome" or any other concurring comment. Oftentimes, a group of soldiers will offer up the "Hooah" response when they are acknowledged for a job well done, or to express their happiness when told that things have gone exceptionally well and they are proud of their accomplishments.

**Box of Rocks - Uncomplimentary description for an Ate Up soldier, who manages to repeatedly do stupid things. Such a troop may be described as "...dumber than a box of rocks".

***Squared Away - This is a description of a soldier who always looks sharp, knows his job exceptionally well and is always on top of things.
****Newbie - This describes a fresh soldier just arriving into your unit.

The Military Wife

Lots of moving...
Moving...
Moving...
Moving far from home...
Moving two cars, three kids and one dog...all riding with HER of course.
Moving sofas to basements because they won't go in THIS house;
Moving curtains that won't fit;
Moving jobs and certifications and professional development hours.
Moving away from friends;
Moving toward new friends;
Moving her most important luggage: her trunk full of memories.

Often waiting...
Waiting...
Waiting...
Waiting for housing.
Waiting for orders.
Waiting for deployments.
Waiting for phone calls.
Waiting for reunions.
Waiting for the new curtains to arrive.
Waiting for him to come home,
For dinner...AGAIN!

They call her 'Military Dependent', but she knows better:
She is fiercely In-Dependent.

She can balance a check book; Handle the yard work;
Fix a noisy toilet; Bury the family pet...

She is intimately familiar with drywall anchors and toggle bolts.
She can file the taxes; Sell a house; Buy a car;
Or set up a move... all with ONE Power of Attorney.

She welcomes neighbors that don't welcome her.
She reinvents her career with every PCS;
Locates a house in the desert, The Arctic, Or the deep south.
And learns to call them all 'home'.
She MAKES them all home.

Military Wives are somewhat hasty...
They leap into:
Decorating, Leadership, Volunteering,
Career alternatives, Churches, And friendships.
They don't have 15 years to get to know people.
Their roots are short but flexible.
They plant annuals for themselves and perennials for those who come after them.

Military Wives quickly learn to value each other:
They connect over coffee,
Rely on the spouse network,
Accept offers of friendship and favors.
Record addresses in pencil...

Military Wives have a common bond:
The Military Wife has a husband unlike other husbands; his commitment is unique.
He doesn't have a 'JOB'
He has a 'MISSION' that he can't just decide to quit...
He's on-call for his country 24/7.
But for her, he's the most unreliable guy in town!
His language is foreign
TDY, PCS,  OPR, SOS, ACC, BDU, ACU, BAR, CIB, TAD
And so, a Military Wife is a translator for her family and his.
She is the long- distance link to keep them informed;
the glue that holds them together.

A Military Wife has her moments:
She wants to wring his neck;
Dye his uniform pink;
Refuse to move to Siberia;
But she pulls herself together.
Give her a few days,
A travel brochure,
A long hot bath,
A pledge to the flag,
A wedding picture

And she goes. She packs. She moves. She follows.

Why? What for? How come?
You may think it is because she has lost her mind.
But actually it is because she has lost her heart.
It was stolen from her by a man,
Who puts duty first, Who longs to deploy, Who salutes the flag,
And whose boots in the doorway remind her that as long as he is her Military Husband,
She will remain his military wife.
And would have it no other way.

Oh what fun it is to call...

I'm generally adverse to using the phone. I prefer text, IM, email or in person. I guess this is a product of being a high visual learner, but thankfully most of the modern world quite easily accomodates my strange preference.

Except, of course, the Army. If you're planning on dealing with the Army, make sure you have your phone fortitude stocked up and a good unlimited minutes plan. Even their fancy pants website with supposedly accurate phone numbers has been a total bust thus far, so it's been more efficient (notice I don't say simply efficient) to just call around and hope someone somewhere has some idea of what I'm talking about. So this has been the fun today:

(Note, each of these are at least one phone call. And sadly, little to no exaggeration below.)
Husband: Ok, so you need to take a terrorist identification training program before we leave for Korea, and your regular passport (which was acquired in haste for the move) won't work- you need to go get a government passport on post for the move. And don't forget your required shots, you can get those on post when you get the passport from the transportation office.
Me: Ok, cool. Post medical clinic, can you help me schedule an appointment for shots?
Medical clinic: Nope, you have to schedule that with your healthcare provider.

Healthcare provider: (4 phone numbers later) Which clinic? Sponsor's full social security number and history? Full medical history? Wait...nope, you can't schedule an appointment, just walk in any day. But make sure you get directions from them.
Medical clinic: Great, here are directions. But if you don't have a sticker on your car, I'm not sure if they'll let you on post. Call the visitor's office.
Visitor's office: Sure, just make sure you come here first with id, licencse and registration and you can get a visitor's pass.
**Victory dance! One task at least one task understood and able to be planned.**

Me: Ok, when can I come get a government passport?
Transportation office: No clue. You definitely have the wrong office. Try the info line.
Post info line: Oh, you need the personnel office. Here's the number.
Personnel office: Nope, not us. Maybe re-assignments? Sorry, we don't have the number.
Post info line: We only have a general info line for assignments, it's (proceeds to give me first clinic number I was given an hour and a half ago).
Me: Awesome. Let's try the website for "new to all this mess"... Civilian Advisory! Sounds helpful.
Civilian Advisory Center: Please leave a message and we'll get right back to you.
Me: SHANNON SMASH!!! Ahem, please give me a call back with the number for passports as everybody on post, not to mention your website, seem to have misplaced it. Thank you.
Post website: I'm sorry, your search for "assignment" cannot be completed. Service is not running.
Husband: Wow. Try this number.
Transportation: How the heck did you call us again? No.
Husband: Ok, it has to be this one for sure. It's the passport office.
Assignment office: Yes, we can help set up an appointment but there are no openings until March 19.
Me: That might be a problem, we're trying to leave March 25th.
Assignment office: Well, it takes 6-10 weeks to process. Have you filled out paperwork A, B and C?
Me: Um, no idea. Can it be rushed at all? Where do I get this paperwork?
Assignment office: Well, I'll schedule you for the 19th. Call the passport office tomorrow at this number and they can give you the paperwork. Good luck.
Me: Good luck indeed.


On the up side, I'll never forget the area code for the post ever again.

Vocab of the day:

Korean: 전화 =  telephone

Military: TAP-IT= telephonic automated produce information technology