Oh what fun it is to call...

I'm generally adverse to using the phone. I prefer text, IM, email or in person. I guess this is a product of being a high visual learner, but thankfully most of the modern world quite easily accomodates my strange preference.

Except, of course, the Army. If you're planning on dealing with the Army, make sure you have your phone fortitude stocked up and a good unlimited minutes plan. Even their fancy pants website with supposedly accurate phone numbers has been a total bust thus far, so it's been more efficient (notice I don't say simply efficient) to just call around and hope someone somewhere has some idea of what I'm talking about. So this has been the fun today:

(Note, each of these are at least one phone call. And sadly, little to no exaggeration below.)
Husband: Ok, so you need to take a terrorist identification training program before we leave for Korea, and your regular passport (which was acquired in haste for the move) won't work- you need to go get a government passport on post for the move. And don't forget your required shots, you can get those on post when you get the passport from the transportation office.
Me: Ok, cool. Post medical clinic, can you help me schedule an appointment for shots?
Medical clinic: Nope, you have to schedule that with your healthcare provider.

Healthcare provider: (4 phone numbers later) Which clinic? Sponsor's full social security number and history? Full medical history? Wait...nope, you can't schedule an appointment, just walk in any day. But make sure you get directions from them.
Medical clinic: Great, here are directions. But if you don't have a sticker on your car, I'm not sure if they'll let you on post. Call the visitor's office.
Visitor's office: Sure, just make sure you come here first with id, licencse and registration and you can get a visitor's pass.
**Victory dance! One task at least one task understood and able to be planned.**

Me: Ok, when can I come get a government passport?
Transportation office: No clue. You definitely have the wrong office. Try the info line.
Post info line: Oh, you need the personnel office. Here's the number.
Personnel office: Nope, not us. Maybe re-assignments? Sorry, we don't have the number.
Post info line: We only have a general info line for assignments, it's (proceeds to give me first clinic number I was given an hour and a half ago).
Me: Awesome. Let's try the website for "new to all this mess"... Civilian Advisory! Sounds helpful.
Civilian Advisory Center: Please leave a message and we'll get right back to you.
Me: SHANNON SMASH!!! Ahem, please give me a call back with the number for passports as everybody on post, not to mention your website, seem to have misplaced it. Thank you.
Post website: I'm sorry, your search for "assignment" cannot be completed. Service is not running.
Husband: Wow. Try this number.
Transportation: How the heck did you call us again? No.
Husband: Ok, it has to be this one for sure. It's the passport office.
Assignment office: Yes, we can help set up an appointment but there are no openings until March 19.
Me: That might be a problem, we're trying to leave March 25th.
Assignment office: Well, it takes 6-10 weeks to process. Have you filled out paperwork A, B and C?
Me: Um, no idea. Can it be rushed at all? Where do I get this paperwork?
Assignment office: Well, I'll schedule you for the 19th. Call the passport office tomorrow at this number and they can give you the paperwork. Good luck.
Me: Good luck indeed.


On the up side, I'll never forget the area code for the post ever again.

Vocab of the day:

Korean: 전화 =  telephone

Military: TAP-IT= telephonic automated produce information technology